Promise of Living

I am thankful...
That my poor exhausted 3 year old is sleeping soundly after a rough evening
That both children are (basically) healthy and happy and growing/developing well
For my poor husband that just went back in to work at 9:35 on Thanksgiving night to try to make this self-employment thing keep working
For those that keep our world safe despite the fact that it often means they have to work holidays
For tasty food, solid shelter, plentiful clean hot water, and flush toilets
That neither I nor anyone I love is in Mumbai
That none of my family, including me, have yet been laid off
That gas is half what it was at the beginning of the summer
That the waistband on my pants is looser than it was a month ago
For my new gloves that do not have holes in the fingertips
For winning the November prize at the Jewelry Making Forums
For my church job and being asked to sing Christmas Day at my home church
For the people who have been so supportive of my singing - my AWCD, Pam, my AVT, Christine, my beloved late voice teacher, Jacquelyn Jarret, and my husband
For music
For joy
For laughter so hard I start coughing
For the times I don't hit myself though I feel like it
For those perfect nights when there's a hint of magic in the air and I feel so connected with the earth and the universe that everything seems possible.
That learning is a continual process and I get to keep doing it
For a place to express myself
For a means to express myself
And for you... all my blog friends... whose comments mean a whole heck of a lot to me as does the gift of your time in reading whatever nonsense I'm currently spewing out - Amanda, Betty, Carol Sue, DreamLurker, FoxPhile, Graymama, Greta, Harriet, IWOM, Jade, JerseyTjej, LauraJ, Marsbarn, Raindog, SmileyMamaT, Willow (gone but not forgotten!), and everyone who stops by here.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone.

~~~~
*The Promise of Living, The Tender Land, Aaron Copland
This was the recessional at our wedding. The ending 'verse' goes...

Give thanks for the sunshine
Give thanks for the rain
Give thanks we have hands to deliver the grain
Oh let us be joyful
Oh let us be grateful
To the Lord for his blessing
(Oh let us sing our song
And let our song be heard
Let's sing our song, with our hearts
and find a promise in that song.)
The promise of living
The promise of growing
The promise of ending
is labor and sharing and loving.

21 Day Challenge | Day 9 | Thanksgiving, Parts I - III

9. Thanksgiving, Part I

My grandmother died
on the Monday before Thanksgiving.

My grandfather died
on the Monday before Thanksgiving
three years later.

My second child died
two Mondays before Thanksgiving
seven years following.

I begin to wonder
for what I should be giving thanks,
I who am bounded on either side
by death.


Thanksgiving, Part II

Much has been given me,
and I am,
indeed,
very grateful.

I am grateful for my daughter,
all blond curls and flirtatiousness,
grateful for my husband,
arms and heart wrapped firmly around me,
grateful for my home, and family, and friends.

I am so angry though,
furious
even.

I am angry that I will be able to eat without nausea,
without stomach roiling in a progesterone-induced tumult,
angry that I will be able to fill my wineglass,
and my coffee cup,
angry that I will be drawn into conversations
that have nothing to do with my lost baby
but everything to do with living

Thanksgiving, Part III

May it be given me,
to be grateful for the
struggles
that I encounter.

May I be granted
the diligence and
faith
to see past the
despair
to the lesson,
whatever
it maybe.

May I surround my companions
with a sense of
love
and gratitude
and be given the
perseverance
to tread
onward
with a lightened step
and loving
heart.