Feb 24, 2009

Audition Avoided

But positive results anyway!! The women's choir I sing with is doing the entire Pergolesi Stabat Mater for Good Friday and I got picked to do one of the alto arias (Quae morebat et tremebat) and one of the duets (Quis est homo) - YAY!! The really neat part is that we're actually doing it with strings and not with just the organ. How freakin' cool is that??!!

Labels: ,

Feb 19, 2009

The Most Useful Onion

Ok, so 3 people recently have mentioned Greek yogurt to me - how it was really high in protein (20 grams per cup) and didn't have the mouth feel of regular yogurt (shudder). Eventually I do usually figure out when fate's trying to bonk me over the head so I bought some. Ok, more accurately? I shamelessly batted my eyebrows at my husband who bought some.

Ok, I couldn't eat this stuff just out of the tub but neither could I eat sour cream just out of the tub. That said, this stuff is pretty darn useful. We got the fat free version - and, basically, it tastes and "feels" like sour cream and not like yogurt. Ok, so this is a plus but what to do with it? Add an enormous onion and make dip.

500 g tub of fat free Greek yogurt
1 large sweet onion - diced rather more finely than I did and sauteed in as little olive oil as necessary to keep it from sticking.
1/2 tsp onion powder
1/2 tsp salt

Mix it all together. Voila - a fake French onion dip that's much lower in fat, has a bunch of potassium and Vitamin C (thanks to the onion), and a ton of protein. Whee!!

And, yes, I was good - I ate it with lowfat crackers instead of with the Fritos Scoops I really wanted... ;)

Labels: , ,

Feb 16, 2009

On feeling simultaneously young and very old indeed

Thank you all for your good wishes and for not asking if I'm crazy!

So, as those of you who are mathematically inclined could easily determine from my birthdate on my ultrasound, I'm 41. I'll be 42 in April. I'm old. Ok, I'm not really old in the general way of things (and certainly not behaviorally!) but, in terms of being pregnant, I'm old. And being AMA (advanced maternal age) engenders (heh, pun fully intended) a host of things - one of which involves extra progesterone. For those of you who don't remember (or who never knew), progesterone is responsible for many of the lovely side effects of early pregnancy, including exhaustion and nausea. So, yeah, this pregnancy is so kicking my ass. I could probably be in bed all day and still be wiped out. Unfortunately, I can't *be* in bed all day (more's the pity that!!) as I've the rugrats to chase. And the lovely low-level nausea that dogs me much of the day (until just about 4 pm) does nothing for my mood either.

Now, in my last pregnancy, I took the symptoms as a good sign - things were progressing as they ought. What with this extra progesterone coursing through my system, God only knows whether this is a good sign or just a sign of well-meant medical intervention. Sigh.

At any rate, yeah, I'm old. I'm already easily the oldest mom at any playgroup though, luckily, I don't look it (thanks be for small mercies). My mother and many of my friends think I'm stark raving mad to do this again. Truth is, we never expected it to happen. We weren't trying but neither were we trying not to. We had such trouble getting pregnant for our whole reproductive history that who would think that at our age I'd get pregnant the normal way. I mean - go figure!! That does not mean, however, that we aren't thrilled. I'm ecstatic, actually (well, except when queasy - queasy tending to interfere with any feeling other than being queasy), and am really looking forward to one last baby.

There is something about the kids that keeps you at least a little young. My 3 year old makes me off the wall nuts mad but her joie de vivre, her flamboyant boisterousness is contagious. The baby, now 10 months old, is so curious and frighteningly physically adept (she not only unplugs the night lights, she takes the shield off and unscrews the bulb). How could anyone feel old when they spend a good part of the day watching her little boomba scuttle across the floor chasing the cat?

That being said, I'll probably call it permanently quits if this baby makes it. The risks for miscarriage, etc. get higher the older you get and I really, really don't want to go through that again. Also, I've spent the predominant amount of the last 7 years either pregnant or trying to get pregnant. That's a goodly amount of time worrying about one's onboard roommate.

Actually, I'll probably call it quits if this baby doesn't make it as well. You move on as best you can, try to distance yourself from that pain, that aching need to hold the child you never can, bringing it only out occasionally to feel anew that burning anguish. But it never goes away. It's always there, tucked neatly away, hidden lest it offend or make someone uncomfortable, ready to come out of its own volition, wreaking agonizing misery, arms stretching for a child that will never fill them, voice whispering, barely audible, pleading with the fates for the impossible, and tears that will not be quenched. No, I don't want another child's death on my soul.

The Baby That Wasn't (No. 2) would be 20 months old now (it's been 2 years, 3 months, and 4 days since s/he left us) and, of course, Evie probably wouldn't be with us - it's such a mixed feeling. So, old, young... either way, fingers crossed and prayers said for baby #4 to join us happy and healthy in September.

Labels: ,

Feb 11, 2009

Oh Baby

The little bean is measuring right on target at 7 weeks 4 days, giving us an estimated due date of 9/26/09. The heartbeat was fluttering away - no trouble seeing it! I'll be going back every 2 weeks through the first trimester.

Feeling rather relieved here as the last time we conceived after having a baby, we lost the baby; though it wasn't until several weeks after the initial ultrasound, the baby measured really small at the u/s then and the heartbeat was hard to find - so measuring right on target and a lovely flutter was a big relief.

Labels: , ,

Feb 1, 2009

Facebook Foibles

Anyone else feel a certain amount of pressure to put something pithy in their Facebook status line?

It's odd how difficult I find it sometimes - how to find something relatively light and fluffy, that won't scare people, or offend people.

Kelley is fucking sick and tired of always being cold and wearing 18 layers and polarfleece wristies in the house and really wants to go to someplace warm where she can drink without responsibilities. (NOT ok.)
Kelley is freezing her ass off. (ok)

Kelley is a fucking idiot that can't seem to manage to remember whether she means piton or crampon and is too damn lazy to look it up. (NOT ok.)
Kelley has mommy brain. (ok)

Kelley needs about $1000 worth of $200 problems fixed on her car but can't possibly afford it *and* pay her daughter's preschool tuition. (NOT ok.)
Kelley desperately needs new back tires. (ok)

Kelley is pissed off for a stupid reason, feels beaten on by life even though vast numbers of people have it far worse than she does, worries that she's never going to have time to do anything but mother and work, and is lonely. (NOT ok.)
Kelley is grumpy that her favorite wings place isn't taking any orders tonight. Stupid football game!! (ok)

See? It can be done but it's difficult at best sometimes.

On another note, I find it very interesting, now that I've got the whole paid church musician thing going on, how different sermons given by two different priests on the same Gospel can be. And I'd planned to discuss the differences in today's sermons here (it was the Gospel of Mark, the bit about Jesus casting out the unclean spirit within the man in the temple) but I'm pretty sure I can't remember them enough. The second one had to deal with how the unclean spirit was the only one who recognized the divinity of Jesus and then delved into how the Gospels mention the healing power of Jesus 30-some-odd times but that 14 of those times are within the Gospel of Mark - the shortest of all the Gospels and the only one to begin with Jesus already being grown. No doubt, Fr. Tom would be very disappointed that I can't remember his homily but I hope he'll cut me some slack, it was the 8 a.m. Mass and, even though I'd been up since 6, I really wasn't very awake.) It is ironic, however, as the second one is the one I almost fell asleep during.

Kelley is exhausted, barely awake enough to sing, slightly low blood sugary, and freaked out about getting to her second gig on time. (NOT ok.)
Kelley finds that two sermons is one too many. (ok)

Labels: , ,